Writing on IFS, Relational Life Therapy, Brainspotting, burnout, relationships and motherhood.https://shabnamlee.com/https://shabnamlee.com/why-you-keep-having-the-same-fight-and-how-to-finally-stop/https://shabnamlee.com/why-you-keep-having-the-same-fight-and-how-to-finally-stop/You have had this fight before. You know exactly how it goes. One of you brings something up, the other gets defensive, and within minutes you are both…Thu, 11 Jun 2026 00:00:00 GMTCouplesIFSRLThttps://shabnamlee.com/5-things-you-do-in-a-fight-that-make-everything-worse/https://shabnamlee.com/5-things-you-do-in-a-fight-that-make-everything-worse/Most couples come to therapy saying the same thing: "We need to communicate better." And then they tell me what they fight about. One partner is always on…Wed, 03 Jun 2026 00:00:00 GMTCouplesRLThttps://shabnamlee.com/your-relationship-isnt-dying-from-a-lack-of-love-its-dying-from/https://shabnamlee.com/your-relationship-isnt-dying-from-a-lack-of-love-its-dying-from/Most couples I work with don't walk into my therapy space because they stopped loving each other. They walk in because they can't seem to get through to…Fri, 29 May 2026 00:00:00 GMTCouplesRLThttps://shabnamlee.com/beyond-the-blues-an-integrative-approach-to-depression-therapy-that-honors-your-whole-self/https://shabnamlee.com/beyond-the-blues-an-integrative-approach-to-depression-therapy-that-honors-your-whole-self/Depression therapy works best when it addresses more than just your thoughts. If you've been struggling with persistent sadness, low energy, or a sense of…Wed, 20 May 2026 00:00:00 GMTACTBrainspottingIFSIndividualshttps://shabnamlee.com/effective-therapy-for-anxiety-and-panic-attacks-finding-your-path-to-peace/https://shabnamlee.com/effective-therapy-for-anxiety-and-panic-attacks-finding-your-path-to-peace/Anxiety and panic attacks can feel overwhelming, especially when you’re juggling the demands of work, relationships, and personal growth. If you’re…Wed, 20 May 2026 00:00:00 GMTACTBrainspottingIFSIndividualshttps://shabnamlee.com/finding-an-anxiety-therapist-a-holistic-approach-to-lasting-change/https://shabnamlee.com/finding-an-anxiety-therapist-a-holistic-approach-to-lasting-change/If you’re dealing with anxiety that shows up as constant worry, panic attacks, or that exhausting feeling of never quite being able to settle, you already…Wed, 20 May 2026 00:00:00 GMTACTBrainspottingIFSIndividualshttps://shabnamlee.com/how-trauma-lives-in-the-body-and-what-it-takes-to-heal-a-holistic-guide-to-trauma-therapy/https://shabnamlee.com/how-trauma-lives-in-the-body-and-what-it-takes-to-heal-a-holistic-guide-to-trauma-therapy/Trauma lives in the body long after the mind has moved on. If you have ever felt your heart race at a sound that reminds you of something painful, noticed…Wed, 20 May 2026 00:00:00 GMTACTBrainspottingIFSIndividualshttps://shabnamlee.com/internal-family-systems-therapy-understanding-your-inner-world/https://shabnamlee.com/internal-family-systems-therapy-understanding-your-inner-world/Have you ever noticed different voices pulling you in opposite directions? One part of you wants to speak up in that meeting, while another whispers that…Wed, 20 May 2026 00:00:00 GMTIFSIndividualshttps://shabnamlee.com/relational-life-therapy-building-deeper-connections-through-mind-body-and-nervous-system/https://shabnamlee.com/relational-life-therapy-building-deeper-connections-through-mind-body-and-nervous-system/Life has a way of testing us. Maybe you’re navigating the pressure of demanding work environments while trying to maintain meaningful relationships.…Wed, 20 May 2026 00:00:00 GMTCouplesRLThttps://shabnamlee.com/the-beautiful-chaos-of-a-mothers-heart-what-hamnet-gets-right-about-high-achieving-mothers/https://shabnamlee.com/the-beautiful-chaos-of-a-mothers-heart-what-hamnet-gets-right-about-high-achieving-mothers/Last night Jessie Buckley won the Oscar for Best Actress. She was crying before she even reached the microphone. She has an eight-month-old at home. And…Wed, 20 May 2026 00:00:00 GMTMothersIFShttps://shabnamlee.com/the-part-of-you-that-sabotages-your-relationships-isnt-the-enemy-understanding-ifs-therapy/https://shabnamlee.com/the-part-of-you-that-sabotages-your-relationships-isnt-the-enemy-understanding-ifs-therapy/You know that moment when everything’s going well in your relationship, and then suddenly you find yourself picking a fight over something small? Or when…Wed, 20 May 2026 00:00:00 GMTIFSIndividualshttps://shabnamlee.com/understanding-act-therapy-a-guide-to-acceptance-and-commitment-therapy/https://shabnamlee.com/understanding-act-therapy-a-guide-to-acceptance-and-commitment-therapy/You’ve probably heard about Acceptance and Commitment Therapy—or ACT—and wondered what makes it different. Here’s what I want you to know: ACT isn’t about…Wed, 20 May 2026 00:00:00 GMTACTIndividualshttps://shabnamlee.com/when-talk-therapy-isnt-enough-how-brainspotting-reaches-trauma-your-mind-cant-access/https://shabnamlee.com/when-talk-therapy-isnt-enough-how-brainspotting-reaches-trauma-your-mind-cant-access/You’ve been in therapy for months, maybe even years. You’ve talked through your past, analyzed your patterns, gained insight into why you react the way…Wed, 20 May 2026 00:00:00 GMTBrainspottingIndividualshttps://shabnamlee.com/why-we-start-every-couple-with-an-intensive-and-how-it-changes-everything/https://shabnamlee.com/why-we-start-every-couple-with-an-intensive-and-how-it-changes-everything/When couples reach out for therapy, they’re often expecting to book a weekly session. Maybe Thursdays at 6 PM, fitting therapy into the margins of an…Wed, 20 May 2026 00:00:00 GMTRLThttps://shabnamlee.com/your-body-remembers-what-your-mind-wants-to-forget-why-trauma-healing-needs-somatic-work/https://shabnamlee.com/your-body-remembers-what-your-mind-wants-to-forget-why-trauma-healing-needs-somatic-work/You’ve talked about the difficult memories in therapy. You’ve gained insight into your patterns. You understand why you react the way you do. And yet…Wed, 20 May 2026 00:00:00 GMTIFSIndividuals